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Mom came back after bailing for 20 years.

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  • Mom came back after bailing for 20 years.

    I grew up with my dad for most of my life. When I was younger, my mom left us and went to a foreign country, which none of us knew where. All her siblings would just say she went to another place with no further explanation. Dad tried to find her but to no avail. After years of searching, he decided it was best if he focused his attention on me rather than looking for someone who doesn’t want to be found.

    My dad passed away 2 years ago and now my mother comes back saying sorry for abandoning us for over two decades. She said she was sick and didn’t want to be a burden to me and my dad. She said she knew my father wouldn’t be able to sustain all the cost for treatment while spending for my education. I don’t know how I feel about her reason or how to feel for her. Should I listen to her? Do I welcome her back to my life?

  • #2
    I think you still need to welcome your mom into your life even if your dad already passed out. You need someone beside you. Let her payback to you. Let her show you that there's still a chance.

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    • #3
      She's is still your mother no matter what, You can take things slow with her if you really want her to be a part of your life again. Try to spend time with her during the weekend ask her what happened during the years that she was away from you guys

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      • #4
        While your sorting out your true feeling for what she did to you and your dad, why not get to know her for the time being. Tell her that your interaction with her for now is only temporary since you're still sorting out your emotions towards her. Just tell her that in the right time you would tell her if you would really want her to be back to your life or not

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        • #5
          Maybe you should answer this question first, do you want her to be a part of your life again or not? If the answer is yes then go and catch up with her already, if it is a no, tell her the reason why you don't want her back in your life

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          • #6
            She is still your mother no matter what happened, It's good she still came back after several years. You should forgive her, I think It's not her intention to leave you guys, she just don't have any choice that time.

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            • anitabanger
              anitabanger commented
              Editing a comment
              Are you willing to accept her back into your life whatever the reason might be?

          • #7
            What are the reasons you will not accept her in your life again? Ask that question to your self. I guess she came back because she wants to make up for the lost chances of being with you.

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            • #8
              She deserves to be accepted back in your life she has been through a lot. I hope you will be able to realize that.

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              • financialcowbird
                financialcowbird commented
                Editing a comment
                So you wouldn't factor in what he has felt with her past actions?

            • #9
              This is really a sad story but I know inside you, you are longing for a mother's love. Don't miss it this time.

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              • #10
                She's still your mother. Maybe for now it will be hard for you, but sooner you'll learn to accept her already

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                • #11
                  Yes, you should welcome her, because she probably suffered a lot for leaving you with a guilty conscience, even if the reason she said she left is not real you should welcome her again in to your life, I mean gradually so you get to know who she is and all

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                  • #12
                    I think first you'll have to judge whether or not she's telling the truth about being ill.

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                    • wigeon
                      wigeon commented
                      Editing a comment
                      Only a con-artist would use the reason of being ill that is why he or she decided to be less of a burden and leave them instead

                  • #13
                    That's a hard one and up to you to decide the truth

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                    • #14
                      Listen to what your gut says, she might be into something. We never know though.

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